You know what scares the hell out of me? Writing this blog and sharing my “feelings.” My Scorpio sun hates showing emotions especially uncomfortable ones. This year I didn’t have any goals I set out for as far as New Year resolutions go, the only thing I wanted was to be happy.

What was going to get me to said happiness? Change! Raw and uncomfortable change!

I want to lose weight so what am I doing? Getting up 2 hours earlier to workout, meal planning, and checking in on Instagram. This resolution is literally no different than any other year’s resolution.

2019 I set out to start this blog and write about things I love, unfortunately I only posted twice. The second post more emotionally draining than the first. I remember holding my breath while writing and hitting publish. From that point on I promised myself I was going to write a post once a month.

I thought I was going to be the “typical blogger” with various photoshoots in multiple outfits talking about all things shallow and superficial.

This blog has changed direction from me initially wanting to write about beauty and health to now a personal blog more specifically me writing about my mental health and life lessons.

I really don’t want to be vulnerable but I feel in my soul I must share my story and what I go through.

So now here I am again in 2020 with the same goals as the years past with “new” ways to achieve them.

I guess I could say I have so much more insight into my life than before. Lets go through a list of things I’ve learned…

This time last year I remember having terrible anxiety. Now I know if I’m starting to get anxious its because I am dehydrated! I have also upgraded the type of water I drink to alkaline water. I feel more hydrated than ever.

I’ve also learned that even though a plant based diet works well for me I still enjoy a little meat and dairy in my diet, and by dairy I mean cheese.

I’ve learned that when people start getting on my nerves or rubbing me the wrong way TELL THEM most people are not mind readers. In general assuming that other people know what we want or need is kind of selfish to them and hurtful to us in the long run.

Even if after you tell the person if they don’t understand that’s ok too at least you know that person is not emotionally mature enough to handle yours let alone their own emotions.

I care less about other people’s opinions than I did a year ago. Don’t get me wrong I still second guess myself, but I push through all the negative self talk and do what makes me happy.

I have a clearer understanding of life and people in general and honestly people don’t change without extreme hardship and compromising situations. And even with that some still remain the same. No one wakes up one day and says, “How am I going to be a better person today?” Please know this and walk away from toxic people!

Pain and hardship in life bring better understanding of self and those around us. It provides us with deeper empathy and evolution of the soul if we allow it.

Take the time to think about all of the information you’ve gathered from the past year and how you will implement those things into this new decade.